Belated Birthday Resolutions
Why?
These posts are my way to reflect on the past, present, and aim for more excitement in the future. I feel a bit older now. I've been doing these goals for eight (!) years and counting. It's a long time. And it still pales in comparison to living the life of a centenarian for example.
Last year I set too many goals. Six? And they were pretty extensive. I'm looking to narrow it down this year. I'm also more focused on what life is about, bigger picture stuff.
As I'm past the first quarter of my life and seeing relationships and paths (patterns) last through longer, I also feel internal changes driving me to allow life to unfold more patiently and over longer periods of time. That's different than slowing down though. I'll reflect more on this as time goes on.
Past: 2018, 2017, 2016, 2015, 2014, 2013, 2012
Thanks, previous years!
What are the most amazing accomplishments of 2018?
- Traveling for almost half the year. This was quite a change, and a challenge too! I think my favorite place this year was Greece. I loved it so much, I'm considering living there!
- Growing my relationships. I am very fortunate to have so much love around me. Looking to more growth for 2019.
- Continuing to grow Uplift. It's one of the greatest things I've ever done, and continues to get better. I think in 2019 there will be even more growth, and with careful steering it'll turn out beyond what I can imagine right now.
- Spending time with family. I feel like they are more and more a part of my life as we're coming all together in Colorado.
- Kitesurfing more this year. I really missed it last year and it's felt great to do it more. As I travel more in 2019 I plan to continue this trend.
- Reconnecting with my kitesurfing community has been great as well. It's one of my favorite parts about the sport.
- Taking time off. Disconnecting and camping--I hadn't camped this long before. And without internet, and in a quiet place, it was healing. I also took time off more legit this year and really enjoyed it.
- Delegating more and more on the business side. To our office assistant (now bizops manager!), other engineers, and more!
- Exercised and maintained a good routine at home (less so on the road, but kiting helped). This includes regular me-time, rewarding!
- Shared family, Romania and more of my life with my amazing partner. Visiting Romania again was wonderful.
- All this while meeting my work and earnings goals!
What adversities did I face?
- Feelings of jealousy and insecurity. I've started working on this, to be continued...
- Alone time on the road. Ironically I felt lonely in 2017 traveling solo, now the opposite.
- The stress of taking on too many work projects. At least it didn't happen in November and December like the years prior, thanks a lot to help from others.
- Release of sexual energy. It seems to keep growing, and I'm still learning how to best handle that. Doesn't help that in society we shun and shame sexual expressions. Exploring this in connection with spirituality, 2019.
- Upper back pains and tension. While I'm doing well with the rest of my body, I seem to strain between my shoulders.
- Regular exercise with travel. Home routine was great in the first half of the year, and then kind of dwindled. It was hard to get back into things at home after being on the road. And on the road I didn't maintain good exercise outside of kiting and hiking (those were substantial!).
- Still got tension in my body. Mostly during the times when I was working too hard, or stressing about stuff, and not taking the time to meditate or exercise.
For 2018 I wanted to:
- P1: Have a Dedicated Self Love Practice
- P1: Gain Weight and Strengthen
- P1: Make Bold Business Changes
- P1: Travel alone and with company
- P2: Give time, money, or both
- P2: Build friendships and lifestyle in Colorado
P1: Dedicated Self Love Practice
Grade: B+
If I was a 3rd party witness to myself, would I approve of how I treat me?
Here's what I did well:
- Spend quality time with myself. Reading, writing, thinking. I did this a few times during the year. Kitesurfing, too. I also spent time fully absorbed and present playing games and watching nature documentaries.
- Started off the year with writing...
- Read quite a bit, maybe 5-8 pages per day?
- Did some dancing and breathwork, but want more.
- Kited a lot more! Did some brainy stuff, including games. Some spiritual journeys too!
- More patient than before.
Not so well:
- Didn't write or journal most of the year. 2019.
- A bit more reading.
- More dance and breathwork.
- Continue growing patience.
- Sleep at times. Admittedly harder with travel, at home I sleep pretty well.
Overall, I treated myself better. Especially with emotions and warmth towards others. I am kinder with my words, spent time reading, kited more. I can improve, especially to relax my body, be more patient, and enjoy slow me-time. There's still some frustration and high-strung energy I'd like to shake off. Meditating will help here too.
P1: Gain Weight and Strengthen
Grade: B+
I wanted to put on weight, maintain flexibility, and feel more confident in my body.
Well:
- Gained maybe 5-7lbs of muscle and fat.
- Exercised quite a bit. First half of the year more so, then a lot more with kiting and hiking. Evolved this for 2019.
- Weight lifted. Yoga at home. A few times on the road and class in CO.
- Continued to kite, a lot!
Nell:
- Didn't exercise enough some weeks, especially second half of the year.
- Didn't get enough massages.
- Would have liked to dance more.
Overall, I do feel stronger, flexible and more confident in my body. Not quite as much as I would have liked.
P1: Bold Business Changes
Grade: A
Work Health Philosophy 2.0 was a major success! Perhaps except for writing.
Wins:
- Have a minimum, average, and maximum target of work hours per week.
- Take 4 weeks off, or more.
- Move to weekly rate for 2+ months.
- Subcontract 2+ projects for 2+ months.
- Mentor, mentor and delegate. Let go of control or desire for everything to be perfect.
- Sell and roadmap, especially Q4 2018.
- Added Careers page, content!
Knead moar:
- Produce content: blog, testimonials.
- Take breaks during workday (5m every 90 min).
- Nap 10/20 minutes.
Overall, I made the most important pieces of this. I think taking breaks is worth tackling, and naps wouldn't hurt either--I struggle to take time away from my day though.
P1: Travel alone and with company
Grade: A+
Another major achievement. Actually, this is the most complete goal of the year I think.
Yay:
- Travel with partner for months and find a good balance.
- Explore USA: national parks, cities.
- Don't work at least one week while traveling with company.
- Kitesurf in three new places! 1x Greece, 2x Oregon
- Visit several new cities: Naxos, Athens, Brasov, Hood River, Portland, Santa Fe, even Albuquerque a bit.
- Did a Greek cooking class in Athens.
- Explore nature in a new way: swam with whale sharks, kitesurf downwinder in Mexico.
- Witness a large turtle laying eggs!
- Experience new feelings traveling with a partner.
Nay:
- Me-time on the road.
- Solo-trip for a week without work. I worked during my solo travels.
Overall this was a new way to travel and one that will evolve and improve even more for 2019. Partner and I already have some ideas in the works!
P2: Give time, money, or both
Grade: B-
This is just barely not a C, mainly because I did take all initiatives to give, but didn't follow through on finances.
Examples of giving:
- Saved $6K, donated some.
- Rescued kiteboards on the water in Mexico. Helped people with advice.
- Gave to clients (one in particular, but also discounts and offers to others).
- Gave to my partner. Quite many ways! I'd like to continue this.
Could improve:
- Volunteer a bit, maybe this is easier to do than donating money.
- Give regularly, totally unexpected.
Overall, I don't feel like I really gave as much as I want to. I think that's going to naturally grow with time, so I'm not including this in 2019. I just plan to continue saving money to donate. There's also an internal project at Uplift to help give more, which will hopefully launch next year.
P2: Build friendships and lifestyle in Colorado
Grade: C-
I didn't really make an effort here to make new friends, but I did develop my existing friendships more. Explored CO a bit more, but not with a regular one thing per month. Travel did make this harder than anticipated, so I'm cutting myself some slack. And six goals is a lot.
2017 goals
I just want to quickly revisit 2017 and note any progress :)
-
Live from the heart
- [+] Spent less time in my head in matters of the heart.
- [+] Embraced challenging emotions (fear, jealousy, anger, impatience).
- [+] Spend QT with friends, community. Romania, Mexico kite group, and more.
- [-] Still blame and punish myself extra.
- [-] Still did not learn about humor.
-
Mentor and write more
- [+] Mentored within Uplift as well as with clients.
- [+] Helped our office assitant invest and grow into BizOps.
- [+] Contract more!
- [-] Still didn't write much.
- [-] Still didn't join a mentorship group.
-
Mental and physical growth through adventure and spirituality
- [+] Built some muscle.
- [+] Did yoga at home for a hefty chunk of the year.
- [-] Lost meditating habit. Also didn't do guided or group ones (a handful at best).
-
Build something
- [+] Worked with Uplift to draft specs and plan for product. Didn't move on building.
- [+] Sold clients on building for them (hey, this counts!)
- [-] Still didn't productize any ideas.
- Still, made progress!
2016 reminders for 2018
Done:
- Embrace sadness, anger, fear and anxiety more. I still feel mediocre at best, but I've definitely grown and that is worth appreciating.
- Laugh and be more patient. Through constant reminders, I was more patient with things this year. I'd like to continue this.
- Subcontracted, devised an application process with the team and sifted through over 70 applicants! This was a huge achievement for the business and we now have a process in place to continue this for 2019. Definitely above-and-beyond the state from 2016/2017.
- Fasting and cleansing. Gained a bit of weight too. Really great investments in my health here.
Carry on:
- Join a mentorship group (to give/receive).
- Build muscle. I have a guide on how to do it, but it's difficult with all the travels--would half-ass work?
- Learn about humor. Practice it.
- Spend quality time with friends. Hike/active stuff, and play games.
- Still didn't write much this year. I did journal privately more than previous years, so it's not a total failure. No public posts. Just drafts started. The main step I took to address this was late 2018, which is to block out a continuous block of time every Friday. Continuing this for 2019 should help.
- Meditate regularly. Guided too.
- Didn't buy a yoga pass until the end of the year, basically. Same for weights ;)
- Host a group meditation.
What now?
If it was December 2019 today and I looked back on 2019, what would I want to celebrate?
Last year, I spiced things up a bit, ya kno? With those 4 primary goals and 2 secondary goals, I split myself too thin. Not doing that again. Over the years it seems that 4-5 bigger goals are better.
- B Self love and confidence. Work through fear and jealousy.
- A Do not overwork myself.
- A Take legit time off. Like I am now.
- B Gain some weight and muscle. Treat my body well.
- A Subcontract and otherwise grow my business. Attempt some slightly scary challenges here.
- A Travel. Alone and with company.
- B Give. Give. Give.
- C Build an active lifestyle with friends in Colorado.
This year, I'm coming back to what works well. With a setup of far-future to present perspective.
Think about what my life would be like when I'm 75. Wow! My parents aren't 75 yet. I'd like to:
- feel strong and healthy, be able to kite, run
- have a loving community
- devote time to self care and others' care
- give
What do I really need to get there? It's incredibly hard to think that far ahead. What if I break it down into 10, 5, and 3 years. What do they all have in common?
- healthy body and mind
- loving community
- always learning
- experiences
- home and travel
- finances
What about the present me, what's important to me now?
- healthy body and mind
- love and belonging
- travel
- having fun, play, kiting, sun
- exercise and sexual expression
- working through my fears and impatience
Year 2019. What about it? The last Sunday of the year I took an inner journey in loving company, and now I'm listening to flamenco music planning as I reflect on the year ahead.
- Honor my body and mind. By end of 2019, I want to feel just as young as last year! This goal includes sleep as priority, strength, meditation, work environment.
- Connect with intimacy and healthy sexual release. Immerse myself in those shared moments, be they with a partner, a community (of kiters, travelers, family, friends) or mentorship.
- Experience the lightness and delightness of being. During travel and at home, see the sacred in what is there, find genuine people, feel the spirituality of the land, explore nature. During travel, add-on me-time.
- Just Fun! Play freely and creatively. By myself, with others. Games, creative piano, writing. Learn from play because it's fun.
Honor my body and mind
Affirmation:
Each day, I grow stronger, and healthier. I direct my energy with full, focused intention.
How can I treat my body and mind even better? This is a continuous goal. Basically, I want to feel "young" and strong for a long time. As such I need to invest more in my self-care.
The 'lets:
- Wake up without an alarm. I've been convinced. Multiple articles now cite the importance of honoring our own circadian rythm. I want to wake up without an alarm during at least 3 months of this year. Bonus points if most of them overlap with workdays! Remember: if I need an alarm, I should change something else instead. Exceptions for flights and appointment times that are difficult to control.
- Sleep when I'm sleepy, and before midnight. While I may be a slight night-owl, I find I rest best when I sleep before midnight. I've tried 10pm, and 2am, and everything in between. I seem to wake up more during the night (late night/morning) if I sleep later.
- Self-care with massage, stretching and yoga. One massage per month. Yoga every week. Stretch every day (whether invert, wrist, brief yoga).
- Gain 5-10lb weight, 5lb muscle. This is hard on the road. Use this guide and add bodyweight exercises to maintain.
- Exercise for 150 minutes per week (diabetes, sleep, heart failure and a longer life). That's 30 minutes per day, five times a week. Ideally, this doesn't include muscle work, but it can include walks, house cleaning, walking through airports, etc.
- Meditate 10-20m daily
- Journal 5 min every day (afternoon or eve)
- Invert 5 min every day
- Invest in a comfier work environment during travel.
Ultimate goal: To feel strong, young and healthy. To appreciate and honor my body and mind, pay attention to their needs.
Connect with intimacy and healthy sexual energy
Affirmation:
I allow loving energy to flow through me, and guide it to create a safe, warm connection with people.
This is the first time I explicitly note sexual energy in a goal. In my 20s I felt perhaps not at the maturity level to focus on it in a healthy way. Well, times'a'changing. I want to connect deeply in the present moment. During travels for example, really be present when talking to someone new. Allow for intimacy. In my love life, experience more intimacy and channel sexual energy.
- Read a book about healthy sexual expression and living a healthy sex life.
- Connect with my kite community
- Connect with communities as I travel, guides, hosts.
- Experience intimacy in my love life and my other connections.
- Spend quality time with family.
- Monthly (or bi-monthly?) sexual build and release
- New sexual experiences of any kind.
- Mentor at Uplift (and in kiting perhaps). See this.
Avoid having people waiting on you. Don't create direct dependencies on your work or decisions, make sure people feel that they can take decisions and still stay true to the vision without referring to you.
Ultimate goal: To share love, teach and learn, be present, and experience healthy, growing, sexual energy.
Experience the lightness and delightness of being
Affirmation:
I am here, and I experience what-is without judgment. I move slowly, mindfully towards nature, people, and myself.
I wanted a "travel" goal this year, since it involves so much. However, I didn't want to create such a split in my mind between "travel life" and "home life". Now, it's all just "life", and it's about experience.
- Experience each place as-is. Present. Open-minded.
- Find genuine people: culture, hands-on, guides, etc. Take the time to meet locals everywhere I travel. Go to a new place every week, or share a new experience, knowledge, pretty open ended here.
- Allow the spiritual side of nature to inspire me. Especially in Peru and Ecuador. Take extra time to look at nature. Pray for 15m at least once per quarter.
- Experience nature: hike, scuba, snorkel, drive
- Eat local
- Take a cooking class or other local experience, especially involving making things.
- Experience things in Colorado (scavenger hunt, snowboard, glass blowing, etc)
- Me-time: continue the regular cadence, add on-the-road.
Ultimate goal: To take in the places I visit. To admire their beauty and purity, sacredness. To embrace the local specifics of nature and people.
Just Fun! Play freely and creatively
Affirmation:
I give myself permission to play like a child, and learn from everything fun.
Last bits of 2018 I've been craving to play games. Lots of games. Been playing quite a bit in December. And I want this to continue. I also want to focus energy on creativity and that could take the form of piano or writing.
- Games! Board games, computer games, social games. Play at least a few hours each week.
- Piano, writing, other creative fun. Do something creative at least once a quarter. See also this.
- Learning all along the way, enjoy every minute of it!
Ultimate goal: To enjoy life, laugh, get creative, exercise different parts of my brain.
To a healthy, loving year!
Thank you 2018!
- Travel beginnings
- Experiences on the road
- Cleansing, eating well
- Partner bonding
- Business growth and stability
- Leisure time and not overworking
- Connecting in kite community
- Kiting a lot more, feeling strong!
- More patience and laughter and feelz
Happy new year! To being healthy, happy, safe! To loving and feeling loved!