The beginnings of my foray Into-Ition

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Tags: intuition, goals, self-help

I've been making it a priority to listen to my intuition more. Indeed, it is my spiritual goal for 2020.

I thought I'd share what the journey's been like so far, for myself perhaps more so than for the rest of y'all.

First off, I just want to take a moment to congratulate myself for getting back into writing. When I was in high school, I would write a lot (a lot for me - a blog post every 2 weeks or so). It seemed effortless and therapeutic. So, yeah, I'm grateful to be here, and grateful to feel excited about writing again.

(Shameless plug: I recently published a post about freelance/consulting, with more to come.)

Here we are, February 2020 (when I started drafting this post). Going on 2 months since the year started (and what a year it will be!).

My affirmation was:

I trust in the unknown, and allow the divine to manifest abundance and possibility through me.

And my goal:

To deepen my intuition, and learn more about myself, the world, and the miracle of life.

I'd been feeling into what intuition means. I recently decided to re-commit to meditation after a some years of overall inconsistent practice. And yoga sort of fell in with that (I guess cause, duh, they go together). And get this--now I'm two months into daily yoga (every day this year!) and more than 40 days of continuous daily meditation as well. Woah. That's gotta help with intuition!

So go figure, it does. Later down are some changes that I've noticed since becoming more mindful and leaning more into my intuition. But first...

What is, intuition, anyway?

Wella wella. This is a question to which I want to deepen my answer by the end of the year.

This is my first draft (v1) of this answer...

Intuition is when you really listen to the red hat when making a decision.

And yeah that's not the best definition for you the reader (unless you've read Edward De Bono's Six Thinking Hats. But I will expand on it plenty over the year.

What's different?

I notice how many more thoughts pass me by.

The more I listen to them, to more I realize how many more there are in the same time period, and also how much my power as an observer is being strengthened (mind-blowing right? haha).

I am going deeper with myself.

To me, being more mindful means living from within. When I meditate or do yoga, my focus is inside.

Pretend these bullets are just asking "why" to the previous one

  • My focus is inside
  • ... when it is so deeply inside
  • ... there is no outside
  • and I also scan my body for how it feels like one hundred thousand percent more time than before
  • ... which is a part of the inside, but only the surface (that's some deep sh**)
  • So I am more motivated to keep my body healthy.

Now get ready for...

I also notice depths and patterns more.

I recently read a book this year called Thinking in systems and I think it has freaking changed my life forever.

(Side note: Unfortunately the writer died, she'll never know in person how much she meant to me! - another reason for me to write).

And now I see systems all around me. The world is systems all the way down, man! And all the way up too.

Here's an example of systems: compound interest.

Compound interest only keeps compounding. That is how it works. That is how you get incredible growth in a short amount of time. For example, starting with absolutely zero money and saving $1,000.00 a year for 10 years with an extra 10% more each year you get to 17,500+ buckaroos. That's a whole 75% more than you earned during that period.

But that's not just money that compounds like that. Everything compounds like that if you look at it in the right light.

  • How much time you spend in joy, gratitude, feeling well, feeling healthy each day will lead to a likely increase of it the next day. Because it feels good! (The law of attraction)

  • How much in touch with your body you are every day, so if you wanna live in it longer, you always look at ways to care more for it (whatever that means to you and you alone--it's your body).

  • How much focus your mind has each day (also a muscle that is exercised by mindfulness). That means each day you have more time in your life. Because time = focus, basically.

  • How much more recently I think of my mind's focus (the next level of the above).

In her book, Donella Meadows taks about the same thing, but she calls it downward loops and upward loops.

This is so powerful that it is true of everything in my personal life. Do I strain my neck too much by looking down too much of the time? Yes. So it's only gonna get worse unless I turn it into an upward loop. This is always possible until systems collapse, like having a posture-related hunchback.

An upward loop in this example would be to spend time looking in other directions for prolonged periods of time too. Start with a tiny habbit! (1 tooth when flossing is one of my favorites haha

I also see why my intuition wants a coach.

I am not always gonna have a strong intuition for something new. But I'll have a coach to rely on in some aspects.

Now it just seems like this blog post is turning into an update about how my year's going, so I guess that's what's going on!

My goal for March is to at least talk to a coach, I don't have to pick one.

I notice how much more comes from the nonphysical.

This is what Abraham Hicks calls it talks about*, and what meditation experts mean as well (like Andy Puddicombe) when they say:

Creativity is as boundless, spacious and limitless as the sky. We are born with it. It cannot be lost and it cannot be destroyed. It can only be forgotten. -- Andy Puddicombe, Headspace

I get more and more ideas than I ever did. And creativity, intuition and ideas are tied together.

Lots of people talk about how ideas come from hunches. Hunches come from repeated exposure to the same thing. And so the compound interest keeps compounding!

*Whether you believe that's genuine or not, is always gonna be hard to tell, that's the irony.

What about the rest of the 2020 goals?

I'm doing great with:

  • getting regular massages
  • taking time to feel grateful, affirmations, mental exercises
  • breathwork, meditation, mindfulness
  • inviting creativity, writing, leaning more into what my gut says
  • waking up early, without an alarm
  • releasing emotions, mostly in writing, but also through creative endeavors
  • enjoying time to myself
  • taking baths
  • exploring deeper sexual energy

Could improve:

  • Journaling. I do it on and off. I do write in my mindfulness journal every week!
  • Writing in general. I'm very close here to meeting my goal.
  • Main thing is I've had some long weeks of work in February. I'd like to work less, and it's been tough with another project starting. However, things are looking good as we've interviewed some promising people who can help us.
  • Taking more breaks and more care of my body. I've been sore (esp upper back and neck), and experienced headaches a few times this year already (only 9 weeks in!). Stepping away from computer work, looking in the distance, looking up, stretching and
  • Cardio and gym. Last year I did really well in the 2nd half going to the gym, putting on some muscle. I started off 2020 with kitesurfing and plenty of cardio in that way, but not much physical movement in February.
  • Movement. Dancing.
  • Worrying less. I recently heard from a mentor that as adults we seem to have forgotten to use our imagination for anything else, and channel it all into worrying. So true.
  • Long meditations. I haven't done any of my 40m meditations. Perhaps I've reached 25-30m a couple of times.
  • Listening with all my heart and 100% focus. I still drift away...
  • Taking time off. Planned a week at the end of Q1! Reminder to have no access to work for 3 days.
  • Coffee shop getaways and working on the house. Though I did a bit, I could do a bit more.
  • Revisit yearly goals and schedule some for Q2!

That's it for now. A good amount of reflection in this post!

Till next time.