Q1 reflections

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Tags: reflections

Preface

Q1 started off OK after Q4 ramped up with more business. I had to work hard on a project deadline which kept creeping towards end of February. I had a nice long trip planned for 3 weeks during this time, and balancing the work with the trip was challenging at times.

Overall it was a great time though, and despite my posture and working either from bed or at a tiny table, my elbows actually recovered. That's even with increased kiteboarding each day! I was really grateful to make some friends at the beach and work through some fears of foiling, as the year prior I had some fairly scary kitemares, while learning to foil. In the end, I returned home more fit, more tan, and more recovered physically. This time, my knees and elbows both felt better than before.

I've continued with physical therapy and working out as I got home, getting plenty of sun, and even snowboarding - I was able to enjoy 5 more days on the slopes, a hot tub, hot chocolate and fun times with a friend. Work never did really get less busy, and had to deal with a whirlwind of adventures with employees leaving, conflicts, and new projects coming about. I was juggling too much.

April started out busy as well, yet as I'm writing this the first "chill" weekend has arrived, and also possibly the last snowy set of days. I'm excited to start the warmer season in Colorado, hopefully with more rain, and windy days for kiting.

These busy times also brought some strain on my relationships, and I'm looking forward to nurturing myself and my close ones through Q2. I'm also looking forward to a trip to the hot springs, and booking more travel for later this year.

I had some help in counseling, and am grateful to have the support that I have. And lastly, hoping to get a car in Q2, it's time to upgrade!

Revisit resolutions

Here are 2024's focus areas:

  1. Physical: Steady and Balanced
  2. Emotional: Warmth and Connectedness
  3. Mental: Tranquility, Roots and Leadership
  4. Spiritual: Fly and Play

Physical: Steady and Balanced

I have definitely ingrained in myself a more gradual approach to overall physical endeavors. I've been keeping up consistent physical therapy, working out, and hobbies/sports. I managed my knees well through 15 days of kiteboarding/foiling, and was able to return to working out - now at roughly 10 weeks of workouts, without any significant knee pain. I did step back when legs were feeling it: getting massages, PT, massage gun, baths, etc. I even bumped my knee snowboarding and managed that well.

Celebrations:

  • Steady, gradual exercise and demands of my body
  • Reduced elbow pain, though it has returned partially on the right elbow since February
  • Consistent PT
  • Awareness of ventral vs dorsal / lower my nervous system alertness overall
  • Digestion, CGM experiments, overall steady even with the travels to Mexico
  • Consistent workouts, including heavy on the squats - days where I was able to do nearly 50 squats + other leg workouts, some with weights! Super proud and excited about this.
  • Loving the sun, especially during my trip
  • Some solid days of sleep in a row, sleeping through the night.
  • Consistent about walking, too
  • Mostly consistent about 1x a week yoga or pilates
  • Improved kitefoiling skills enough where I would try wingfoiling next year
  • Still trampolining here and there
  • Overall lost about 5lbs since Q4, and muscle measurements have not dropped a lot (lost some in the arm). I wouldn't say halfway there on the muscle gain, but the fat loss has gone well.
  • Very committed to stomach acid improvements, bitters, ACV. I look forward to more on this.

Improvement:

  • Still no punching bag
  • Still want to get back into swimming
  • Still stressing out my posture: neck and shoulders
  • Kept up with cardio for most of Q1, but heading into Q2 kind of lost that habit.
  • Not doing both yoga and pilates, would like to.
  • Keep at it with PT and reduce strain on my elbows during work

Emotional: Warmth and Connectedness

Emotionally I've been quite stressed in 2024, and I've felt it and my relationship at home has felt it too. That said, I've also had some great releases, and the trip was lovely and therapeutic, even with the additional stress for a project. There was quite a bit out of my control in business, with turnover and new projects clashing at once.

I really hope things calm down in Q2, so I can renew my efforts to downregulate my nervous system.

Celebrations:

  • Good therapy sessions, working through my self-imposed burdens.
  • Fun with kitties
  • Shopping for a new car, exciting!
  • Meditations, workouts, emotional releases - though more needed.
  • Played board games with friends
  • Handled difficult professional situations. Didn't lose as much sleep over them as I used to
  • Good about taking deep breaths, horsey lips, shaking off the tightness. Baths (though could do more of those)
  • Had some nice family time for birthday celebrations

Room for improvement:

  • Still chasing, busy, on alert. I have a somewhat toxic relationship with pushing through when work gets busy, and neglecting other aspects of my life and myself.
  • Didn't really meet new people, outside of my trip.
  • I miss connecting deeper and more quality time with my partner, and make her feel loved more.
  • Would like to see my parents more
  • Didn't really take time in the afternoons to relax.

Mental: Tranquility, Roots and Leadership

I had more patience with others and even myself, though the challenge was getting through the busy times. Holding it together was challenging at times, and I could do with more self-compassion.

Overall though I managed stress best I could. I do have periods when I pay special attention to my stress levels, and enjoy the sun/walks/day more. But when times get busy, that's when I have a hard time keeping up with healthy habits. I tend to lose my roots and my tranquility.

Celebrations:

  • Consistent minimal breaks throughout the day - 2-3 walks, looking out the window
  • Spent more time in PNS during the start of the year. Struggled to continue this in March.
  • Mindful of dorsal/ventral transitions and practicing those with intention. This was a good outcome of therapy that I hope to build on top of.
  • Lead the team compassionately through challenging times.

Room for improvement:

  • Could rest more and leave more space instead of pushing through, still
  • Daily plan - break down what I must do for the day, leave more room, don't fret so much
  • Still addicted/chasing that sense of urgency
  • Have yet to read or write Romanian, gotta!

Spiritual: Fly and Play

I've deepened my connection to my body and emotions. I can tell more frequently when my body is stressed, or my emotions are flowing through. For example, had times dancing when shivers released through my whole body. Moments of joy. Moments of appreciation.

Celebrations:

  • Enjoying play with the kitties, even when I'm busy
  • Meditating 1x/day 20m again, feels good
  • Enjoyed some beautiful nature time at McIntosh Lake in early April - technically this is Q2, but it was so lovely I had to write it down
  • Enjoyed beautiful nature time in Mexico. Enjoyed many walks in Colorado, spring flowers, gardening, planting veggies, and more.
  • Felt more in tune with myself, my nervous system, my vicious circles of thought.

Room for improvement

  • Appreciate family more, more often.
  • Meditate that second time a day, though I do manage to dedicate 20m now so I'm content.
  • Spend more time with friends, this has been tough in Q1.

Present and future

Q1 ended in a busy haze, and I'm just now coming out of the feelings of anxiety and stress from that. I hope that, through Q2, spring, warmer weather, longer days, and a healthier business, I will be able to break through another level of nervous system stress, and generally spend more time relaxed and less time chasing/pushing through.

I'll wrap up this post with the top 5 things I'd like to focus more on in Q2:

  1. Nurture. Myself. My partner.
    1. Tranquility. Nervous system downtime.
  3. Swim, punch bag, kite, workout, and otherwise physically release frustration
  4. Play more.
  5. Make friends. Connect with people. Laugh more.